Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Well Tailored Spam

This might be my favourite spam ever:

From: BEN LARRY [mailto:bn.larry@gmail.com] Sent: March 25, 2009 8:34 AM To: bn.larry@gmail.com Subject: Order Dear Sir/Madam, I'm Mr Ben Larry and I would like to Order some Scrimshaw.. I want to know the types that you carry in stock as well as the price ranges for me to advice the quantity I desire. however I want this units to be shipped to Ghana West Africa and I want to know the types of credit card you admit for payment. Thank You and waiting for your prompt reply. Best Regard Mr Ben Larry

Did anybody else get this one?

Any thoughts on what types of Scrimshaw I should tell him I have in stock?

16 comments:

Milan said...

Stainless steel scrimshaw is alliterative.

Aggie said...

You should say --the really expensive kind of scrimshaw-- and that you operate only in cash.

David Scrimshaw said...

Hey Milan, I like the Stainless Steel. Makes me think of Harry Harrison's Slippery Jim DiGriz.

And Aggie, of course I only deal in cash.

Asteroidea Press said...

God, I hope I get one. Though writing the answer might be rather horrifying.

other_dave said...

This may explain that email I got from a Nigerian looking for a tailor.

raino said...

i'd ask if they'd like the matte or glossy finish.

Dana Lee Ling said...

Given the global economic downturn, Ben Larry may be serious. Fearing that if the markets recover, gold will nose dive, Ben Larry may be moving his assets into scrimshaw. He may have sussed out that scrimshaw has never lost value. Suggest to Ben that he try ebay.

RealGrouchy said...

Wait, you're a Scrimshaw supplier? I thought you were just a user.

If I'm ever in Ghana and need a Scrimshaw, I'll give you a call.

- RG>

XUP said...

I think you need to be honest. You don't get anywhere in business by being unscrupulous -- especially when dealing with naive overseas customers.

Chelle said...

I've been looking everywhere for some Scrimshaw as well. I hear it cures Graves disease.

Darrell said...

He may have you confused with this guy: http://www.aboutcanada.ca/store.html?showThisProduct=1&productId=1246

Sharon Bondroff said...

We got this one:

Dear Sir/Madam,
I'm Mr Ben Larry and I would like to Order some sextants.. I want to know the types that you carry in stock as well as the price ranges for me to advice the quantity I desire. however I want this units to be shipped to Ghana West Africa and I want to know the types of credit card you admit for payment. Thank You and waiting for your prompt reply.

Best Regard
Mr Ben Larry

David Scrimshaw said...

Sharon, that's fascinating.

I've just sent off a reply to Mr. Larry.

Hello Mr. Larry,

The only type of Scrimshaw I carry in stock is top-quality middle-aged Scrimshaw. It's a type that has done well in Ghana in the past.

Unfortunately, I cannot accept credit card payment. Cash or electronic funds transfer only.

- David Scrimshaw

p.s. Could I interest you in a sextant?

Sage Kara said...

Hi David,

I liked your answer. However I am wondering what if he really wants to get top-quality middle-aged Scrimshaw and if he offers to pay cash, what would you do? LOL

Cheers,
Sage(((~_~)))

Anonymous said...

Here is my email from Ben Larry - dated Nov 15, 2008
Dear Sir/Madam,
I'm Mr Ben Larry and I would like to Order some Corbels.. I want to know the types that you carry in stock as well as the price ranges for me to advice the quantity I desire.however I want this units to be shipped to Ghana West Africa and I want to know the types of credit card you admit for payment. Thank You and waiting for your prompt reply.

Best Regard
Mr Ben Larry

I sent him the best corbels I coould find - bless his heart.

Karma will win in the end.

Anonymous said...

Here is Ben Larry's phone number - at least it was on 12/18/08 - 0044 7024074556