Graffitti that bugs me

Lebreton Station WB 002
Originally uploaded by Dave Scrimshaw.

There is graffitti on the canal wall behind the westbound bus stop at Lebreton Station. Someone took the trouble to climb a fence, go down into the canal and paint the words "hue suck" in metre high white letters with black outlining.

I suppose it is possible that the artist is making a statement against colours. They used white paint. Still it seems almost certain that it is intended to be a punnish insult to everyone who reads it.

If I ever get the energy and nerve to go somewhere I'm not allowed to go, wade around in possibly polluted water, and paint seven very large letters, I hope that I will come up with something better to write.

The Mysterious Junk Garden of Booth Street

I have become mystified by the shifting terrain in front of Chado's Auto Body Shop and Cousin Edy's Garage on Booth Street. At first when the snow melted, I thought the junk had been buried after not being picked up on garbage days. But as a found object artist, some of the junk caught my eye.

Like the broken aquarium. But when I got closer to it, I realized that its placement didn't seem accidental. It seemed more artful.

Then I noticed that other objects seemed to be deliberately arranged.

And almost every day there is a new piece added or the old pieces have been rearranged somehow.

Is it art? Is it outsider art?

[More photos on Flickr]

Something New in Graffitti

Couch Graffitti 001

This chesterfield cushion was placed at the corner of Bronson and Slater. Next to the field that has the big legal graffitti wall. I'd been wondering what good-citizen taggers do when the legal graffitti wall is full.

They wouldn't want to cover up another artist's work, and they wouldn't want to paint on a surface where it's not legal.

Here is the answer. On garbage days, there are discarded sofas on every second block at this time of year. I bet the upholstery is almost as easy to paint on as canvas.

Survival Advice: Alien Abduction

Something I truly appreciate about the internet is how much work it has taken away from me. As someone with a wide knowledge of threats and safety precautions, I feel a tremendous responsibility to share this knowledge with those of you who have spent your time learning less urgent things like how to knit or how to care for tropical fish. I have been berating myself for not preparing a guide on how to avoid alien abduction.

Fortunately, the brilliant and courageous Dr. M. Egan of Alien Abduction Sciences has prepared a concise video that will give you the basics you need to know.

Pay 1% Less for Just About Everything and give Dave $10

This is all about getting a President's Choice MasterCard.

If you cannot pay off your credit card balance every month, stop reading this post now and move on. [Suggestion 1: Managing Your Finances Suggestion 2: Kittens]

I've been meaning to tell you that you should get a no-fee credit card that gives you points that can be directly turned into groceries at a major supermarket chain. Then when you have this card, you should use it for everything that you can use it for.

I'm telling you now because there is something in it for me besides your possible gratitude.

1) Why pay with a No-Fee Credit Card:

• Except for Canadian Tire and home repair guys, you rarely get a discount for paying with cash.
  When you withdraw cash from a bank machine you pay fees that may be as high as $3.00 on a $20 withdrawal. Even a $200 withdrawal from your own bank's machine likely has a $1 fee, or you're paying $5 to $10 for unlimited withdrawals.
• You stop receiving interest on cash when you withdraw it from your account. You stop receiving interest on debit payments when you make the payment. You stop receiving interest on the amount of a credit card purchase when you pay the credit card bill, often more than a month after the purchase.
• You credit card statements become a useful reference for tracking your spending patterns.

2) Why a Points Card?

• Points cards give you something back from your purchase.
• You're paying off the bill every month so the higher interest rate doesn't matter to you.

3) Why to Avoid Various types of Points Cards

• If the card is going to give 1% of your purchases to a charity, you could give that money to charity yourself and get a tax receipt.
• If the points are going towards eventually buying a particular type of car, you may find yourself not actually wanting that car when you've got the points.
• If the points let you buy things in a catalogue, you will find that the items in the catalogue are over-priced. (Say $1000 gets you 1 million points on the catalogue card. It will take 2 million points to buy a kettle that you could buy for $10.00 at Canadian Tire. $10.00 is 0.5% of $2000).
• If the points let you get air miles or frequent flyer points, you will discover translate to roughly 0.5% back on your purchases and you are more limited in flight times than if you bought discounted tickets outright.

4) Why a card that lets you buy groceries?

You always need to buy food. Spend a $1000 on your credit card, you can apply $10 to your grocery bill. Even if the card is for a supermarket that you don't go to every time, you're going to go to a Loblaws or its equivalent a few times a year for basics. If you need your credit card bonus to feel like a reward, use it buy chocolate.

5) Which card to get?

The only one I know about is the President's Choice MasterCard. 1% of your purchases (on everything, not just groceries, and not just at Loblaws and its affiliates) comes back to you as money you can spend on your groceries.

6) What's in it for Dave?

PC Mastercard is having a promotion. If you sign up on the phone [1-866-745-6812] and use the code 336073, we'll each get 10,000 points ($10) to spend on our groceries. You'll have to earn another 10,000 points (by spending $1000 on the card or by other promotions) before you can use the bonus. (Disclaimer: I'm not aware of a way you can get a better benefit for yourself in signing up for the card that doesn't help me out, but there could be such a way.)

Call 1-866-745-6812 to apply for the PC MasterCard
call by May 26, 2008
provide your referral code 336073
More Info: pcfinancial.ca/friend

Another step closer to the Robot Rebellion

Rocky the robotic squirrel can flick its tail and chatter. Can it also puncture your neck? [Times photo: Dirk Shadd]

I want to draw to your attention that deluded or race traitor Scientists have invented a robot squirrel.

While I have nothing against squirrels, I am hoping that those of you who see them as evil vermin will finally realize the gravity of the upcoming robot uprising and you will begin to prepare.

• Partan, S. (2004). Animal Robots. Pages 952-955 in M. Bekoff (Ed.), Encyclopedia of Animal Behavior, Westport, CT: Greenwood Publishing Group. pdf
• It seems squirrels are popular in parts of England.
  

Propeller Dance is coming to the NAC

Propeller Dance Performance and Silent Auction
June 3 and 4, 7:00pm to 9:00pm
NAC Fourth Stage [53 Elgin St Ottawa, ON]

Innovative and inspirational Dance Performance by members of the Propeller Dance Performing Group and Students in Propeller Dance training programs.

Students in the Monday night class will perform on Tuesday June 3rd. One of those students has never performed dance in front of an audience and is somewhat nervous about it. This means that he is not going to explicitly tell people that he will be performing.

Propeller Dance provides dance training and performance opportunities to people with and without disabilities.

Tickets $20
available at the NAC Box Office, through Ticketmaster and from Propeller Dance members (like David Scrimshaw.)

Links:

• propellerdance.com


• propellerdance.blogspot.com
  

Uses for Fabric - Decorate Binder Clips

Jess at How About Orange found herself unhappy with her letter opener and her binder clips. What to do? Cover them with printed fabric.

[Thanks to Kerri for the referral]

The Brass Festival is Coming: Get Your Tickets Now!

The Maple Leaf Brass Band is sponsoring two nights of exceptional music here in Ottawa.

Friday, May 30: The Maple Leaf Brass Band and Capital Brassworks

• Two concerts in one, the Maple Leaf Brass Band followed by


• Capital Brassworks (warning: Capital Brassworks has French horns instead of alto horns).

Saturday, May 31: Soloists: Karen Donnelly, Nick Atkinson, and Nick Hudson; backed by the Maple Leaf Brass Band

• Karen Donnelly, Principal Trumpet NACO


• Nicholas Atkinson, Principal Tuba NACO


• Nick Hudson, Principal Trombone of the Williams Fairey Band
  
  
  Both Nights:
  7:30pm to 10pm
  St Matthias Church
  555 Parkdale Avenue, Ottawa, ON
  
  
  Tickets (1-night/2-night prices) (available from band members like me):
  ADULTS ($15 / $25)
  SENIORS ($10 / $15)
  STUDENTS ($10 / $15)
  FAMILY ($30 / $45)
  
  http://ottawabrassfest.ca/
  
  
  
  
  
  

A Reading at Venus Envy

A week ago Saturday, Megan Butcher and Jennifer Whiteford read with Chandra Mayor at Venus Envy.

I enjoyed Megan and Jennifer's work as I always do. Megan interspersed her reading by throwing five paper airplanes into the audience. Although she aimed away from me, two of the planes swerved and hit me right in the chest.

Do you think that means something? Do you have a different answer if I tell you that the planes contained information about a bondage workshop scheduled for June (not sure if it is this year or last year).

I didn't know Chandra's work before, I really liked her reading. She won the Margaret Laurence award and that is entirely appropriate because her writing felt like something Margaret Laurence might have written had she been born fifty years later.

When you go to readings at book stores, if the reader is boring, you find yourself scanning the book covers. At Venus Envy, the readers have to be particularly engaging to keep you from getting distracted by the magazines, DVDs, and other objects intended to help people with their intimate pleasures.

It is proof that the all three were engaging that I didn't look at the wall of strap-on dildos and harnesses behind the readers until after the show. (Photos in the Flickr set.)

Links:

• More photos from the Reading on Flickr
• Venus Envy
• Megan Butcher
• Jennifer Whiteford
• Chandra Mayor